Went to see Dr Trent on Friday morning as planned after her phone call on Tuesday. I knew from the look on her face when she called me from the waiting area that it wasn't going to be good. Basically she said that it is almost certainly the sarcoma that is back and there is nothing they can do about it other than offer palliative care. There is a very small possibility that all the experts are wrong and it is only an infection. I asked her to give me odds, she declined and said "I think it is the sarcoma". I also asked her how long I have if it is the sarcoma and she had no answer for that either. The active cells spread from my scrotum to my lymph glands.
The area that was spotted on my kidney in the last scan has also got larger. So they now don't think it is a cyst but the cancer spreading to my kidney.
So a biopsy is still planned, at the moment it is for June 5th, but they may change that and bring it forward. I will then have an appointment with Prof Hassan once the biopsy is done to confirm the outcome. That will be either 7th or 14th of June depending on when the biopsy actually happens. The facial expressions of Dr Trent and Dr Pratap, who I saw on the way out, don't lead me to believe it is an infection though. I am looking on the dark side. I am not a straw clutcher.
But my positivity remains and will now be re-focused on making the most of however long I have left. I will keep writing the blog as long as the statistics show people are looking at it. I would like to keep all the doom and gloom to myself, but I just won't be able to, so expect good, bad and weird posts.
12 months ago when they first told me I had sarcoma cancer and it was a particularly aggressive form of cancer I thought I might have to deal with dying sooner rather than later. Then Prof Hassan said "We can beat this" and I went with him, took the chemo and fought like hell. I'm not finished yet, but the odds the experts won't ever give seem to be against me.